Train the Brain More Than Enough – Tony Child

By The D2D Experts

ï„‘

25 Min Read

ï„‘
Last Updated: September 17, 2019

Speaker 1: (00:02)

Bill, Can I help you?

Speaker2: Hey listen up, I’m bringing you the best content to ever exist in the door to door industry from sales leadership, recruiting, impersonal development.

Speaker 1:

Why would I need that?

Speaker 2:

Because never before have we been able to collaborate with the top experts in their industries, sharing their secrets and techniques and what makes them the best.

Speaker 1: Wait, who? Who are you?

Speaker 2:
I’m your host. Sam Taggart, creator of the D2D experts in D2Dcon. Is there a place we can sit down?

Speaker 1:

Well come on in.

Speaker 2:

Vanilla is the fastest way to increase your Google and Facebook reviews through text with a 98% open rate. Vanilla reviews is the simplest cheapest way to interact and engage with customers. Visit us at vanillagood.com for more information.

Speaker 3: (00:47)

Hey everybody, this is Sam Taggart. I’m here with Tony Child and he is a local Utah and yes, so it’s been the first Utah guy in a while. Actually, I just had a guy from Australia, like it was my last guy, but he is the founder of Elevated Worldwide and he’s a national and worldwide speaker and he helps companies with culture mindset, , business strategy.
He is trained by brought Bob Proctor and Coach John Maxwell, so certified in many different coaching programs and. And now helps train coaches and speaks all over the world. So we’re actually gonna be diving in on kind of how to, what makes somebody successful, the mindsets, the, the behavior patterns on really success.
And that could be as a sales rep, as a leader. So super excited to have Tony on the show. And one more thing, he is a speaker at D2DCon, so just a big shout out to that.

Speaker 1: (01:41)
So congratulations. Super excited to have you in January. So if you haven’t got your tickets yet, D2D.com uh, we are going to be interviewing a lot of the speakers so you kind of get to know them and a little bit of the content backgrounds and people we’ve chose. So super excited. I mean this has been a long time coming to try to connect and meet you. I mean, even last year we tried to get something happening. So thanks for coming out and being on the show. Yeah. Excited to be here. So tell us a little bit about your background, like how do you become the training or have coaches and how, you know, like tell us a bit of that, that journey to kind of this point. So it’s been a, it’s been a journey. So I was in banking for 15 years.

Speaker 1: (02:16)
Uh, and I did corporate lending, I did underwriting, I did a bunch of stuff. But at the end of my career I did all the leadership development for the bank. Uh, it was over, you know, few thousand employees and doing leadership development for them and did all the sales training as well. And so they would send me out to different workshops. And one of the workshops that they sent me to, uh, was based out of, uh, out of, uh, based out of Harvard, off the book, the happiness advantage by Shawn Achor, if you haven’t yet. Yeah, I was like, give me, I read that, read that. It’s, it’s solid. It’s a staple. Yeah, it’s, it’s an amazing book. And uh, I remember going to the workshop though and my boss was with me and I, I nudged my boss and like right at the beginning of the workshop, the, the person that was presenting said if you can change the way you think you can change any circumstance in your life. And I kind of chuckled under my breath.

Speaker 3: (03:00)
I’m like, that’s stupid. And uh, and I like nudged my boss Mike. Like, Hey, can I go? And she’s like, well, if you leave, you’re fired. Like you have to stay. And so like finals day, man, that, that two hours, it changed my whole life. I mean changed everything. I changed my degree. I was getting a business finance degree and changed it to a communications degree with an emphasis in positive psychology. Like, um, I started interacting with some of the best people in the world on positivity and how the mind works. Cause my ideal is like, look, if I’m going to learn, I want to learn from the very best. And, uh, so I w I sought out the very best in the world when it came to leadership development and business and then positive psychology and how the mind works. And that was a done

Speaker 1: (03:38)
Proctor is he’s the author of the secret. Um, kind of that whole manifest your, you know, manifestation I guess would be his key.

Speaker 3: (03:48)
Yeah. And the paradigms of what the paradigm does to the, you know, behaviors, things like that. And, and uh, and so I was really, I loved working with him. I was, I quickly became his number one consultant in the world, signed up to coach for him with his, uh, his clients. And, uh, after I signed up with that, became his number one coach. There were just some things that I was, that he was missing based on my now research and positive psychology. And he’s 86 years old. So the guy’s not say as he’s still there, he’s still there, he’s still in Canada at a, and he doesn’t, you know, he doesn’t want anything different. Like he’s going to teach what he’s been teaching for the last 56 years. So for me, I knew that, you know, what if I’m going to really, really help people, I had to go and branch off and, and really do my own thing.

Speaker 3: (04:30)
And so I started creating my own programs, started coaching people through those programs. And what I found is people as they were going through the programs, they were like, tell me like, this changed my life. I just want to coach this. How do I do that? And, uh, just like, you know, how do I do DDD econ? Like you just figure it out. Right? And for me, that was it. Like, how do I do this? So I just follow the same model of, of my mentors and, and uh, now I certify people to go and coach in our programs. And uh, it’s been, it’s been a phenomenal journey,

Speaker 1: (04:59)
so that’s awesome. So, I mean, what does a coach, I mean I think so it’s, I saw this post the other day and there’s this lady that was like, I’m so sick of these self deem coaches in these guys that really don’t even walk the walk and I’ve never done anything and that trying to take my money and coach like I’m assuming you’ve had that right. Oh for sure. So like when you say coach or certified coach or what does it even mean? Like you know what I mean? I think a lot of people had that question of like,

Speaker 3: (05:27)
what is that? There’s a lot of people that have, she’s a French bastardize the the term. Oh yeah,

Speaker 1: (05:33)
yeah. That, that’s why I laughed because everybody can post a cool picture on Instagram. But I’m a co coach, I have a coach. And so

Speaker 3: (05:41)
Ching is a very unique skillset that you have to develop. And I always share people that they’re, that that most coaches that believe that they’re coaching their actual mentors, they’re not coaches. And what, what’s the difference between now a mentor and a coach then will a mentor is somebody is ahead of me and their life and I want to do what they’re doing so I say, Hey, will you coach me? In an essence, what they’re going to do is they’re going to dictate to me what I should do to now get to their spot. Yeah. That’s a mentor. That’s not a coach. A mentor is somebody that is further along than you and you will do everything that they tell you to do. A coach will help you dig the answers out of yourself. Lot of questions, not a lot of dictation. A good coach. If somebody is coming into you and say, Hey, I want to coach you, and then in the first thing they’re telling you, Hey, you need to do this and you should do that and you should that. They’re not a coach.

Speaker 1: (06:33)
They’re just trying to tell you, this is what I’ve done. This is successful. This is what I know to be success. That’s a mentor. Yes.

Speaker 3: (06:39)
A coaches. What do you want? What’s your life purpose? Why are you here? And I’m going to help you dig that out of yourself and we’re going to create your vision. Well, what’s your vision? What do you want to do? You want to be a millionaire? Do you want to have a home in Alaska? Like what do you want? Yeah. And then, and then a good coach will help you dig the answers out of yourself on the how to get there.

Speaker 1: (07:01)
Yes. Cause it’s so funny. I think so many people actually really know the answer. They’re just scared to discover the answer themselves. It’s buried under virus curves. Yeah, there you go. It’s buried. It’s kind of like if you really had to ask yourself, you probably could tell me how, how’d you had a gun to your head? You will come up with a way to figure that out. I guarantee. I just think a coach is somebody that’s willing to say, let’s put a gun to your head and see what happens. Yeah. And it’s interesting cause I, you know, I’ve been in this world now and, and I don’t deem myself no coach. Right? I’m like, I’m the expert and I’m, I’m, I’m a mentor. Right? Like I’m like, I’ve done really well. I’m able to help businesses, I’m able to help clients. But sometimes I’m like, man, I’d love to learn how to be a better coach because there’s a difference between somebody can really extract the greatness out of somebody.

Speaker 1: (07:49)
Right? Yeah. And I think that’s a skillset like you said. And anyways, so off camera, so if you’re listening to this, this is interesting guys, off camera for the last like two hours we’ve been jamming on how do we help other DDD guys and aspiring leaders and stuff like that get certified in, uh, our own custom coaching program. So stay tuned. If you’re listening to this, we are going to be creating a way for, you know, a lot of people get deemed manager, right? So in our industry, it’s like I’m a rep and I became a manager. It’s like, congratulations. You recruited people that doesn’t make you a phenomenal leader and manager. Yeah. You know what I mean? You went through years with Bob Proctor. You went through years with Maxwell, which you look at John Maxwell, he’s probably written the best leadership books probably in the world. Like I couldn’t name somebody written or been deemed better at a leadership training, but it’s like he trains on leadership and it’s like it’s a skill set. It’s not something you just recruited your buddies now you’re now a manager or the guy gave you the title is I need a manager cause we don’t have anybody. You seem to be good. And I think that people there, they

Speaker 3: (08:56)
see that a lot like people died. So the way they should, the way that Maxwell puts it is he has it five levels of leadership. So if you haven’t gone out and purchased five levels of leadership, amazing book, but he talks about five levels of leadership. The bottom level is positional level, meaning I’m your boss, you’re going to do what I tell you to do. That your influence over that person is solely because you hold their paycheck and a, and, and unfortunately there’s a lot of people that that’s, they just are managers and therefore they think they’re a leader. And there’s four higher levels you need to get to.

Speaker 1: (09:24)
And it’s interesting. So I’m listening to good to great right now by Jim Collins. It’s a great one. I was like, I need to recap on this cause it’s a classic and he talks about he interviews 10 CEOs that are like the, you know, big. They, they tripled or quadrupled the S and P 500 over 15 years consecutively. Yeah. And he’s like, what’s interesting after interviewing them is all of them are level five leaders, which meaning they’re leaders amongst the leaders. Right. And they were willing, they didn’t, you wouldn’t know any of their names where, you know, a lot of the big CEOs and they were level four leaders because it was all about them. It was all about, you know, kind of this posturing of how can it benefit me where these CEOs were like, Oh thank goodness I had a great team. And they’re super humble in the way that they empowered others.

Speaker 1: (10:10)
And it’s so interesting to watch in our industry. Like I looked at myself when I managed and security, I was a performance level leader. You know what I mean? It was like sell a ton of accounts and hope they follow. Right? It’s like do what I do. Yeah. That’s probably level three. Yeah. Level three. It’s like reformed performance-based. Yeah. And uh, it was interesting listening to this book cause it was like, man, like what? I can re even identify many five level five letter leaders in our, in our industry and who is being trained and studying to try to accomplish that. You know what I mean? So anyway, I hope that in this podcast, as you’re listening and meet Tony, that you can say, wow, like what do I need to do to level up and stop being a positional level leader and actually go earn my stripes.

Speaker 3: (10:54)
Yeah. And it, and it’s really, you really need to go to your team and say, okay, look, I, I manage these people, I manage these guys. What level of leadership am I on with each of them? Because you’re probably on a different level with each person. You know on one person you just recruited them, you’re on probably a position of leadership, but then you got another guy that you’ve really developed a good relationship. That’s the second level permission leadership. Yep. But when you get into now performance, like I’m getting results and I’m going to teach you how to get results. Now you’re into the fourth level when I’m going to teach you now how to go get results. But the fifth level, this is a level that very few get on and that means I will run through a brick wall for you. I will do anything for you. You tell me to do it. I will do it. Yeah. There’s very few that if we looked on our team that they would, they would do anything for us.

Speaker 1: (11:38)
And I think, I think the problem with this industry, and you probably know it cause your brother-in-law and things like that have been in it. It’s sad, but we have such a scarcity mindset. It’s because we’re so afraid to lose a rep to another competitor

Speaker 3: (11:54)
or you know, it’s so cut throat in the recruitment game that I think it inhibits a lot of people to really become level five liters. Yeah. Because it’s like we create this whole man, if I really was giving him proper feedback and true coaching, he’s not gonna feel good a lot of times in the second, some of us received that feedback and not feel good. We run and we say, well, the grass is always greener on the other side. So I would actually advise anyone listening to this to ask yourself, are you open to receiving positive real life hurt feedback that might not feel good and are you gonna give the guy the burden to be like, well, this guy wasn’t giving me negative feedback. Yeah. And I think it actually limits the ability for there to be level five like leaders in our industry.

Speaker 3: (12:39)
Yeah. In order to get to a level five, you really have to come from a place of complete abundance. Meaning there’s more than enough and uh, you genuinely, you’re, you’re very generous. You’re not doing it to get gain. And, and unfortunately in the, in, in the door to door industry and also like, and just major commission sales. It’s all about what’s my, what am I, what’s in it for me? What am I going to get out of this? And uh, when you learn to get past that, that’s when you tap into the level five leadership. And there are some, yeah. And I th I think it would be so cool to watch people just say I’m committed to that and live a lot more abundant. Yeah. So let’s talk about kind of what, like you obviously coach, you’ve coached coaches, you’ve been through all these programs, you’ve seen guys fail, you’ve seen guys succeed, you’ve watched kind of this, yeah.

Speaker 3: (13:28)
You know, obviously spectrum. So what are the principles that make somebody successful like baller status? Like what do you tell them? Like what, like what do you see? So there’s four, four main threads of all high entrepreneurs, salespeople, athletes. I was with the New York Yankees last year, Brian Cashman, and, and, and really just studied like what makes a professional like a true professional. What, what, what is the all MBA versus just the all star? What is the all the NFL pro bowler versus just a starter. Like what is it that is the upper echelon that is going to get me to that highest level? There are only four things, but when you learn to master these four things, you, you can then apply it to every facet of your life. So number one, these people are guided by their vision, not reality. They are guided by their vision and their vision is huge.

Speaker 3: (14:21)
It’s bigger than themselves. It th they’re big. Their vision is so big that if they knew how to do it or could logically connect the dots, that means it’s not big enough. It’s huge. And there and when people tell them you can do that, they give them the bird and I say watch me. And they are guided by that vision. They are guided by that pro bowl. They are guided by that NBA championship and they will not let anybody tell them they can’t do it. That’s number one. Number two, they build beliefs around their vision. Mm. So any belief that is now holding them back from their vision, they will destroy it and they remove it. So these people are highly self-aware, highly self-aware. Then number three, they build behaviors and habits around the beliefs and vision. So you got to have the vision first, then you’ve got to have the right beliefs that you can do it. And then you got to start building the right behaviors and habits that will now get you to build on those beliefs in that vision. And then number four, which is what I love, what you’re doing, is they create, they have the right network. It’s the right people.

Speaker 1: (15:29)
If you want to get to where you want to go, I want you to think of Sam, just think about this for a second. In your life, think of one thing in your life, some of your greatest accomplishments that happened 100%

Speaker 3: (15:40)
by yourself. Can you think of any?

Speaker 1: (15:49)
See, ya know, there’s always people involved, always pizza in some sense. I mean there’s always, there’s always somebody that was impacted. Somebody impacted me. Somebody. Yeah. Did you get introduced to your wife? How did you show up to where you met your wife, like your kids? That obviously takes to like the point is every single creation in life

Speaker 3: (16:07)
happens with and through other people. Yeah. And so the key is not what am I going to accomplish? That’s the vision obviously, but who is going to help me? And you’re always on the lookout for the who, not the what, because through the who, the what will happen. So those are the four things, vision, awareness and beliefs, the right behaviors and habits, and then surrounding yourself by the right people. You change the people, you change your life. I’m a researcher out of Harvard, his name was dr McClellan. He shared this. He said, your reference group are the people you habitually associate most with. And these people will determine as much as 95% of your success or failure in life. Going off of kind of a Jim Roan become the average of the five people you associate most with. Who are those people?

Speaker 1: (16:53)
Yeah, no. And that’s like, honestly, we’re jam obviously before this, but that mastermind, like, you know, like I’m going to these Lake Powell with all these guys that I have this group with and it’s like, it’s much more for me than it is for them sometimes. I’m like, yeah, like I just didn’t the facilitator. Yeah. But the cool part is I get to take guys like bawling out CEOs to Lake Powell and the creation, the accountability, the, you know, we’re all running a marathon next year. And it’s like, yeah, I probably would’ve never done that. That’s real high accountability. It had had they not put me on a group meet that is literally every day. How far did you run? And it’s like, Oh, we’re doing, we’re, we’re really doing this. But it’s like, it’s so cool to see how just those people are now inspiring each other

Speaker 3: (17:40)
to do greater things. You know what I mean? So I’m a part of a mastermind group that, it’s a national mastermind group. It’s called the breakthrough mastermind with Scott Duffy. And there’s some people, the average net worth probably 50 to a hundred million. Wow. And I am definitely the bottom of that totem pole, right? You’re like, Oh, I bought the type of conversation that these people hold is on a whole nother level that I’ve been thinking. And the point is, is you’ve got to get on that level of talking and thinking. And in order to do that, you got to interact with those people. Yeah. And so that’s why it’s so important. You could have the beliefs, you can have the, the the vision and you can have the right behaviors. But if you’re not interacting with those people, it’s going to be very hard for that vision to come alive.

Speaker 3: (18:23)
I love that. So let’s say somebody struggles, like I’ve had this question asked me a lot, I don’t even know what I want. And I struggle guys like, and I trust me, I get this all the time. You were talking about this. Yeah. I can’t think of a vision. What do you, what do you tell a guy like that? So I mentioned that I was with Bob Proctor and I was his number one consultant in the world. And where we would start coaching people is what do you want? And I found about 85% of the people would just look at me with like this deer in the headlights look, what do you mean? What do I want? No, what do you dream about? What do you want? I don’t know what I want. And I would spend weeks with them and I was just like pounding my head.

Speaker 3: (19:02)
Cause 15% of the people I would help, they would like get it. Like, God, this is exactly what I want. Like they’re pulling out of their pocket, like it’s already written down. They know exactly what they want. And so I was very, very perplexed by this. Why? How can people not know what they want? And uh, you know, as a man of faith, I knelt down just one day and I’m like, okay God, what is missing? What is the one thing that if I were to go learn it and it could transform this question? And I just sat there and I just listen it, you might find this crazy, but it was teach people how to be grateful. I was like, grateful. What do you mean grateful? And, and so my next question, by the way, asking you shall receive. My next question was, well, what does it mean to be grateful?

Speaker 3: (19:47)
And my whole world changed at that moment. Over the next year and a half, I dove into gratitude and how gratitude changes people. And it was the most fascinating year and a half of my life of really understanding this whole idea that if I am stuck in lack, not enoughness, there’s not enough time, not enough money, not enough resources, not enough leads. If I’m stuck in not enoughness, it is impossible for my brain to figure out more than enough. Meaning my vision, what do I want? Dreams. But when I can learn to see through a lens of, wow, there’s more than enough now I can reap. And what I found is about 15% of the population live in abundance and the other 85 live in lack. So what would I do first with people is we do an intense month of gratitude to just shift their heart from I don’t have enough to, wow, I am very blessed. I have more than enough and then I can help them find their,

Speaker 1: (20:47)
I love that. I’m writing a book right now on all this, I call it the achievement formula. So I’m like nugget, right? Yeah. I’m like nugget, if you’re like, listen into this, it’s crazy. And that like there’s the key. It’s you’re stuck in this, I’m not enough. I call it I’m not worthy or I didn’t even ever think I could ask for what I want. Yeah. So I’ve just trained my brain to shut up and say stop dreaming. You’re just going to be a P on like everybody like has told you and those in your network are, and you can scroll on Instagram and look at the guys being successful, but you’re not them. And I think so many people live their life in this not enough mentality, like you said, not enoughness. And it’s sad. And I, and I even catch myself there. Like I look at certain, you know, like equities of my life and I can definitely tell you where I still lack.

Speaker 1: (21:44)
And it’s like, dang, I just need somebody to fricking smack in the face and be like, you can have a happy this and you can do this. And you know what I mean? Like I just think there’s so many people, if they don’t even pay attention to there, that belief system, that thinking, that way of being, they’re going to live forever that way and never tap into that potential that they’re truly capable of. And what you focus on expands. I mean this is really, really important to understand. Tony Robbins nailed it. That what you focus on expands. Okay, so, so if I focus on what I don’t have, guess what will expand in my life. More of what you don’t have more of what you don’t have. Yeah. What gratitude does, it is impossible to think about what I don’t have when I’m grateful for what I do have.

Speaker 1: (22:32)
Yeah. Do you see that? Like if I can train my brain to constantly look at life through this lens of, wow, I am so blessed then I am now looking through the lens of I have more than enough. And guess what happens magically? You get more. I get more, more than enough, and so it’s, it’s this paradox that most people are like gratitude. I’m grateful. Well, if you really thought about it, do you ever walk around life with, I don’t have enough love in my life. I don’t have enough money in my bank account. I don’t have enough time in the day. There’s not enough hours to get everything done I need to get done. There’s not enough leads in my life. Like if you walk around life with any of these comments going on in your head, you’re not grateful because if you were truly grateful, that wouldn’t exist.

Speaker 1: (23:17)
You wouldn’t be thinking that way. It wouldn’t be your thought pattern. No, it wouldn’t be your thought. Walk around kind of like, Oh my gosh, look at the opportunity I’m still standing in. Yeah, it’s crazy. Oh my gosh. If you’re listening to this, write that down and then check yourself the rest of the day. If you’re listening the rest of the day, what I want you to do is to catch yourself. When you get into the, not enoughness in the lack and say, let’s retrain the brain, start thinking different. And that’s when we start seeing more than enough.

Speaker 3: (23:48)
Yeah. And, and, and when you truly get into gratitude, you’re going to be present. And that this is the whole idea in coaching right now. It’s are you present? Are you here? Uh, if you’ve ever read the book by Keck are totally, uh, called the power of now he shared that that here is never good enough for a lot of people that, that, that they would always rather be somewhere else. And what gratitude does is gratitude centers me here. I’ll give you a quick example. I had a, an office in Provo and, uh, I have, I have coaches that come all over the world that want to follow me and, and, and, you know, pick my brain on what it is I’m doing. And so I had a coach from Michigan, he flew in, never been to Utah before and, and he drove down to the Marriott there right by, um, just right off of university Avenue in pro if you’re familiar with it, where that is.

Speaker 3: (24:32)
And uh, so it was night that he was there and I was picking him up the next day to take him to my office. So I picked him up at Marriott and we’re driving up university Avenue North on university Avenue. So, uh, East, if you look out the windows East out of the passenger window, if you’re driving North, guess what? You see these big massive mountains and if you’re seeing this right now, my knit, my, my, my, my face is tilted upwards cause that’s what I’m seeing is I’m looking at the guy next to me. I’m like, dude, what are you looking at? And he looks at me and he says, Tony, do you just not look at these mountains like every day these not just Marvel in their majesty? And I looked at him and said, no, I don’t see them now. I see them, but I don’t see them, see them. How many other things in life pass us by that we see. But we don’t truly see how many people in our lives passes by that we don’t see them because we’re not present. We’ve got so many distractions, so many things that are calling our attention. Are you here? Are you present? Cause life is here not a month from now or a week from now or even an hour from now. It’s here and are you present?

Speaker 1: (25:45)
I literally hit that yesterday. Yesterday I like looked up. I was like, wow, these are like mountains. I live here. They like it like sunk in yesterday for like maybe the first time in a while. Yeah. And like, cause I was in Florida all last week with these clients and they come back and I was just like, you don’t get that many places. You know what I mean? We take, we just take it for granted, but that, but then a month later I went to, I went

Speaker 3: (26:11)
to San Diego and I was sitting on the beach, we were having breakfast with a, with a network marketer that I was helping and we were sitting on the beach and she had a beach house. And we’re sitting there having breakfast and I’m looking at it,

Speaker 1: (26:22)
the ocean saying the exact same thing. She’s like, no, I go to work. Like I don’t see it every day. So, so what things are we missing in life? So crazy. So what are some other things? Let’s say, okay, let’s talk to, here’s, here’s, here’s where I want to go with this. To kind of wrap this up. Last thread, what advice would you give leaders and managers

Speaker 3: (26:44)
in this space to help bring people out of this, you know, terrible mindset or you know, they’re stuck, they’re not performing like they should be. Like if you were to give advice to coach those people and you said, Hey, here’s some tips on helping them and serving them to give that leader, what would you tell him? And this is going to be really hard for people to hear, but I’m going to say it anyway. We live in a very competitive environment that in order for me to win, someone else has to lose. And uh, that, that comes from this lack mentality.

Speaker 4: (27:24)
Mm.

Speaker 3: (27:25)
And, and so what I would share with, with any leader is to learn how to look at life, not through a lens of competition, but creation. How can we create, and the thing that I love most about D to D is that you have created an environment of non-competition. You’ve created an environment of, Hey, look, dude, we’re all in this together. Let’s create what can we create together? Yes. Instead of, Oh, you know what? No, like I’m not going to come because I’m going to be able to recruit or all of these things like you’ve, you’ve taken that out and you said, look, no, you can’t do that here. And what you’re, what you’re helping leaders get into is this idea that you know what, there is more than enough. And, and by, by eliminating competition, by the way, many, many people put their self worth on what they achieve.

Speaker 4: (28:20)
Mm.

Speaker 3: (28:21)
Meaning if I don’t get X sales today, I am worthless. And then the leader will reaffirm that you didn’t get excels today. You are worthless. And all that does to a person is reaffirms their negative bias. It reaffirms their idea that I am worth nothing. And so when, now I’m not saying don’t hold people accountable, you got to hold people accountable. But there’s a way of doing it to allow people to continue to believe and feel that they’re worth it. And so I always share this. So I’ll end with this. And that is joy is found in the creatine, not in the creation. And too many times we find we want to find joy in the creation. Like, Hey, when I get there, then I’ll be happy when I get that cell. Then I’ll be happy when I have that, then I’ll be happy. And what psychologists have found today, and this is what intrigued me so much a decade ago when I was in that workshop, is that successful people are not successful by their happiness, but because of their happiness

Speaker 4: (29:31)

Speaker 3: (29:32)
they don’t, they don’t get to the top and say, when I get there, I’ll be happy they got there because they were happy. And so what are you doing to create positivity and in your offices?

Speaker 1: (29:43)
What are you doing to make it an office of, Hey, we can do this instead of you suck. Like what are we doing to really, really inspire people to come out into their best version? Because when they do trust me, they will sell and sell and sell. When they truly believe that I don’t dang good seller, I could do this, but they got it. They got to get there. Sometimes I think we just don’t have the patience or we don’t have the knowhow or we don’t have the, somebody taught us the wrong way, so we just teach it the wrong way too. Yeah. So hopefully people walk out of here inspired to be like, maybe I can break the habit of how this industry is led. Like you said. And I appreciate you saying that because it was like I’ve been beating this dead horse of like so many people was like, I’m not going to come to door door cons cause you know, I don’t want my guys to go recruit her.

Speaker 1: (30:36)
I don’t want to recruit. I would recruit if I came. So I just don’t want to come. And I’m like, you’re missing the point. Come as a team, learn as a team, lead as a tribe because we can create something way cooler if we all play ball together. Oh yeah. And you know the same thing on your team. It’s kind of like that guy, his belief system. You’re the one that created it cause you make him feel like he’s a sucky suck rep and now you’re sitting there trying to coach him. But you’ve reaffirmed this di does done belief system that’s subconsciously now dictating his result. Yeah. And so I love that and I love just the joys is found in the creating, not the creation. And I think so many times people in our industry are like, Hey, I’m going to do this for five years and then maybe get a real job or I’m going to do this for three years and then go do something else.

Speaker 1: (31:28)
I’m like, well what does that saying? You’re just not enjoying the journey. You’re not enjoying like what you’re doing right now. Yeah. Why don’t you just like suck up and be like either quit cause you hate it or just learn to love it and you’ll probably do it a lot longer. And I think that’s the guys that really succeed in this business are those that say, how do I just enjoy this job instead of always be looking for how to get out of this job and do the other jobs that seem to be much more enjoyable. But then they come to find that they’re the same their jobs and they suck and or they are great. You just have a habit of making every job that you do suck or you have a habit of making every job you do. Amazing. And I think that that’s kind of the kind of this common cycle I see in this industry.

Speaker 1: (32:12)
So I’d invite you if you’re listening to just say, where am I at? I love that. So one last nugget. Is there any other things that you’d be like, Hey, last little tip piece of advice for the industry. Do you have any other like fight too? I mean, I almost turn my page. I’ve been taken down. If you’re listening to this comment, share, give Tony some love because I’m excited to hear from him and David econ cause I’m like, this is almost like a little teaser. You got me all bothered. Yeah, I’m going to do some

Speaker 3: (32:40)
things that D to D con that are gonna expose people to really how they see life. So the last nugget that I’ll share came from Shawn Achor. Um, and it came from his TEDx doc. If you haven’t gone, just search in happiness, happiness, advantage, and YouTube and you’ll find it. It’s, you know, a huge hit. It’s as TEDx talk, he said, this said, it’s not our reality that’s shaping us, but it’s the lens with which our brain is viewing reality that’s shaping us. And if we can change that lens, not only can we change your happiness, we can change every single educational and business outcome at the same time. It’s not your reality that’s shaping you. So it’s not the, the rep as they’re out there and they’re like, this sucks. It’s the lens of this sucks that’s creating your reality instead of just like, so I love what you just said.

Speaker 3: (33:26)
I’m like, look, you get to choose how you see your reality. But for a lot of people, 95% of their life has habit. They don’t think about it. They just do it. And so that lens was automatically created in them when they were little boys and little girls and now it’s controlling their life. Did you know that by the time a child is 17 years old, they’ve heard the words? No. You can’t. An average of 150,000 times as opposed to words. Yes, you can. 5,000 times. That’s 30 no, you can stay every one. Yes, you can think about it like a kid’s in the grocery store and he goes up to mom and says, Hey mom, can I have this? And before mom even looks at what the kid wants, the automatic responses. No you can’t mom, can I go play with? No, you can.

Speaker 3: (34:10)
They don’t even know who they want to go play with. No, you can’t. They hear this over and over and over again. So is it any wonder that when this person is 40 30 25 years old and they’re out on the streets, guess what their predominant belief is? No you can’t. I can’t do this. And as soon as the brain says, I can’t, the problem solving to make it happen, we’ll go down to zero. So the one nugget I would share at the very end here is, look, if you want to change your life, change your lens, change your lens, /fire guys, fire. Just

Speaker 1: (34:46)
put the extinguisher up because, geez guys, this is good. Thank you so much for being on the show and super excited to have you out door to our con and a set a work together guys. Like I said, secret little, little plug, a little hint. It’s common. We’re going to craft a cool coaching program that we can help kind of develop guys that’ll learn some of these, you know, principles these teaching on right here. I’m sure that a lot of this is part of your . Yeah, I was going to say, I’m like, I’m not, you’re not pulling this out of here, but you’re pulling this out of 10 years of research and coaching coaches and you know what I mean? So that’s where I’m excited to learn from you and honored to be part of your network. So

Speaker 3: (35:25)
thanks so much for being on the show. Thank you. Thank you. Sided excited for DVD con. Make sure you’re there. Yeah, see you guys.

the d2d experts blog

Free Business Assessment (Owners Only)

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of the ad2con6 conference with stylized lettering and geometric shapes.

Reserve My Spot Today

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of d2d bootcamp featuring bold, uppercase letters with a military-inspired design, symbolizing a training program aimed at discipline and skill development.

Get A Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Get a Free Demo

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of the d2d sales training summit with stylized letters and numbers in a monochrome palette.

Save My Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

The image is a logo that combines a red swoosh accent above the word "elite" written in a bold, black font.

Get A Free Consulting Call

You have Successfully Subscribed!

The image displays the logo of the d2d sales business bootcamp, which is stylized with a red and black color scheme and features abstract shapes that could represent connectivity or networking concepts.

Free Vender Packet

You have Successfully Subscribed!

the d2d experts blog

FREE VIDEO SERIES

You have Successfully Subscribed!

the d2d experts blog

60 Pages Free for ABC's of Closing

Fill out information below and we will send your free download

You have Successfully Subscribed!

the d2d experts blog

FREE D2D PLAYBOOK

Fill out information below and we will send your free download.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

the d2d experts blog

CLOSING MINI COURSE

You have Successfully Subscribed!

A red silhouette of a business bootcamp boot-shaped country outline against a dark background.

FREE TAX CONSULTATION

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Save My Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of d2d bootcamp featuring bold, uppercase letters with a military-inspired design, symbolizing a training program aimed at discipline and skill development.

Download Our Business Playbook

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of recruiting playbook, featuring a stylized 'x' above the word 'recruiting' and a playbook graphic incorporated into the letter 'p' of 'playbook'.

Get My Free Recruiting Playbook

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Silhouette of a person with a backdrop of red and blue, symbolizing the energy of d2d sales.

Join The National Knocking League

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of the competitive reality TV show 'Survivor', with a stylized font and an iconic torch above the letter 'v', symbolizing the intensity of a business bootcamp.

Join The Survivor Competition

You have Successfully Subscribed!

The image depicts a logo for a business bootcamp named "the straits," featuring the text alongside a stylized red icon that resembles a combination of the letter "a" and a geometric shape.

Join Our Competitions

You have Successfully Subscribed!

The image appears to be the logo of "d2d experts," which is stylized with a red and black color scheme, incorporating a distinctive x-shaped graphic element as part of the "experts" text.

Become A Partner

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Alarm Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Solar Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Pest Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Roofing Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Recruiting Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

FreeSales Training

FreeSales Training

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Sales playbook logo with a stylized, abstract representation of an upward trend and a playbook strategy symbol integrated into the text.

Get My Free Sales Playbook

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Sales Training Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Business playbook logo depicting a stylized playbook with a red checkmark, representing strategies for successful business practices.

Get My Free  Business Playbook

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free D2DU Access

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Free Business and Leadership Demo Request

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Silhouette of a person with a stylized design, set against a red and blue background, accompanied by the initials "nkcl.

Learn More About Our National Knocking League

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Silhouette of a person with a stylized design, set against a red and blue background, accompanied by the initials "nkcl.

Learn More About Our National Knocking League

You have Successfully Subscribed!

A logo featuring the words "closer school" in capital letters with a sniper scope graphic centered above the 'o' and a red stamp overlay on the right side indicating a "live event.

Get Your Tickets

You have Successfully Subscribed!

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2du logo with a stylized red house roof accentuating the letter 'u'.

Get Access To D2DU

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of the d2d sales training summit with stylized letters and numbers in a monochrome palette.

Save My Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Ad2con6: the emblem for the sixth edition of an advanced design and development conference, featuring a sleek, modern logo in purple and magenta hues.

Reserve My Spot as a Vendor

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of d2d bootcamp featuring bold, uppercase letters with a military-inspired design, symbolizing a training program aimed at discipline and skill development.

Ultimate Business Experience and Training

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2experts: your trusted resource for precision guidance and expert advice.

Learn More About D2D Leads

You have Successfully Subscribed!

D2experts: your trusted resource for precision guidance and expert advice.

Save My Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of d2d bootcamp featuring bold, uppercase letters with a military-inspired design, symbolizing a training program aimed at discipline and skill development.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Abr: always be recruiting - the proactive motto for relentless talent acquisition.

Always Be Recruiting

You have Successfully Subscribed!

A stylized icon of a house with a line through it, set against a dark red background, with the words "sales planner" written above. it appears to be a graphic related to planning or management in the context of real estate or housing sales.

Download Your D2D Sales Planner Today!

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Logo of d2d bootcamp featuring bold, uppercase letters with a military-inspired design, symbolizing a training program aimed at discipline and skill development.

Get A Spot

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Colorful logo of "analytics fit" featuring a stylized chart design with a pink peak, orange ascending line, and purple descending arrow, indicating data analysis or business performance metrics, with the word "fit" in bold, dark lettering.

We'll Reach Out To You Here Shortly!